Put on those shades and wave to yesterday, the sunlight hurts my eyes.

Another long day, Another sleepless night.

Insomnia and I get along far too well... At least this is better then 3:30.

Hung out with Gray all day today. Twas a good day. We chilled, chatted, gamed, and stole some pallets from behind a local mall that wants to use for firewood on saturday.

It seems like I've been getting a hold of alot of ladies lately. Star, Wind, Luna, and even a few more ghosts from my past have been popping up here and there.

I think it's a good thing. By that I mean, I'm glad I'm socializing more. I don't think I'll ever have enough socialization. I really love people.

I've been thinking about Nightingale alot, as I have been for the last few months. I really am far too in love with her. It's strange, I guess... I don't want to get my hopes up about being with her. I know very well that there is a good chance that I won't happen. It feels like no matter how hard I try, our lives just don't want to match up. Even with me going back to school, if she has to stick around in our hometown for an extra year... I dunno... Another three years is a long time. I don't really mind, it's just, fate isn't being kind.

And half the time lately, I feel like she doesn't have any interest anyway. It's very possible (And probable) that I'm overthinking things, but still...
I dunno. I guess I just feel like she's so perfect, that I'd been worrying that I'd never find anyone as amazing as she is. And while I haven't found anyone like that, the flurry of girls getting in touch reminded me that there are still other girls out there, and that I don't have to stress out so much, and worry about not getting her.
I still will.

But at least now it's significantly less justifiable.

Gray and I may be going out to party with Star tomorrow night. She wants to go to bars and clubs now that she's nineteen. I think beer pong is also on that list, which should be interesting, cause I've never played before.

Gray is also having a get together Saturday which I'm... I don't know how I feel about it.

One of his friends has a rather severe distaste for me, which I can't do anything about. I've never had a problem with her except with how critical and unforgiving she is. Regardless, Gray wants as little drama as possible. I agree, and will glad find something else to do, if need be, I just think that it's frustratingly stupid that one person can dictate group dynamics so strongly simply because she refuses to be civil and reasonable.

I can't really think of much else, except that I still need to come up with names for other friends.

I like journalling like this. I think it's helping me drain my brain at night and sleep. Granted, it's still pretty late, but it's better then usual.
I think sleep is going to be attempted now.

Forever and Always

Stryker